That Summer
by btrfanfiction1516
Summary: You don't choose who you love. Your heart does. Your heart doesn't understand that loving that person could lead to your own destruction. That summer was when he told me those three simple words that were so short, yet meant so much, that every girl longed to hear. "I love you"
1. Summer of heat

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James could still hear that giggle if he closed his eyes. She was in this room an unreasonable amount of time, and for a lot of it, giggling at James as he commented on something as he kissed her.

Heck, she had been on this very bed. He figured his parents hadn't changed the mattress, and despite the fact that the sheets and comforter had been washed, they were still the same.

He let his head fall to the side of his friends car window car they arrived back at the apartment after they went out and saw a movie, James closed his eyes, trying to get the girl who had been on his mind...out of his mind, Ever since that day he last saw her, he couldn't seem to stop dreaming about past times he had with the brown eyed beauty. He figured she forgot about him by now.

* * *

"I lied to her," I said after one of the many memories subsided.

"What are you talking about bro?" Kendall, my best friend asked, a confused look plastered on his sun kissed face.

"I lied to Katie. I promised her that we'd stay together, even if I ever went out to California. I lied to her, and I lost her forever." I let out a deep sigh before letting his head fall onto the couch cushions in my parent's large living room.

"C'mon dude, you have to stop feeling sorry for yourself, I mean, you can't keep beating yourself up over something that happened two years ago. You can't change what has already happen." Kendall told me, heading into the hallway and making his way to kitchen leaving me alone.

_Great talk Kendall, appreciate it_... I think to myself

I sat alone looking at the room, The walls were painted white, family photos from past vacations and school photo's hung along the walls, accompanied by large paintings. The floor was white marble and the couches were large black leather. My parents were always redecorating the house, reinstalling new carpet, or getting new furniture. So every time I would come and visit them, the house would be unfamiliar to me. My bedroom was the only thing that stayed the same it seemed like.

I got up from the floor and roamed the room,

My eyes gazed over the familiar family photos; My eyes stopped wandering when he saw a familiar face in one of the photos. The photo was from a Halloween party my family had when I was in fifth grade. It showed Kendall and myself with the other two boys; Logan & Carlos all huddled together in a big circle, as they smiled wide for the picture.

I of course was dressed up as a zombie as well as Carlos, because everyone knows zombis kick so much ass, and as for Kendall, Kendall was a vampire and Logan was dressed in a batman costume.

What really caught my eye though was the small brunette who was in a fairy princess gown who was waving her magic wand over Carlos, the girl in the princess gown was Katie. I don't remember much of that night because it was so long ago. But I remembered bits and pieces.

A small smile crept onto my face as I remembered when Katie had managed to smash a cupcake into my face for no reason at all other then the fact that James had taken her fairy wand and wouldn't give it back. Which I guess seemed like a good enough reason.

"That was such a wonderful night." my mom said aloud, appearing behind me causing myself to slightly jump.

"You guys were just so cute in those costumes." She told him again taking the picture from his hands and smiling. "Do you miss her?" Was all my mom asked me after the few moments of silence.

"Of course I do, I just wish….you know, things could be different, that I could change the past and have everything perfect again." He managed to say before he looked at the other photos.

"Love isn't perfect. It isn't a fairytale or a storybook. & it doesn't always come easy. Love is overcoming obstacles, facing challenges, fighting to be together, holding on & never letting go. It is a short word, easy to spell, difficult to define, & impossible to live without. Love is work, but most of all, Love is realizing that every hour, every minute, & every second was worth it, If you really love her James, You won't let the past get in the way of what could have been, focus on right now and think of what could be." My mom told me, before kissing me on the forehead and walking out of the room leaving me to ponder on what my mother had just said.

* * *

_Katie:_

I was suppose to hate him, yet how could I? He was my bestfriend, my _everything_. And as much as I hate to admit I miss James, the boy I could tell anything to.

"The more things change, the more they stay the same."

I'm not sure who was the first person was who said that, probably Shakespeare or maybe Sting, but at the moment that sentence that best explains my tragic flaw-my inability to change. I don't think I'm wrong in this. The more I get to know other people, the more I realize it's kind of everyone's flaw. Staying exactly the same for as long as we finally do change, I don't think it happens like an earthquake, or an explosion, or all of a sudden you're like this different person. I think it's smaller than that, the kind of thing most people wouldn't even notice unless they look really really close. Which thank God they never do, but you notice it. Inside you, that change feels like a world of difference and you hope that it is, and that this is a person that you get to be forever, that you'll never have to change again.

If I could lie to you and tell you love was the eastiest thing in the world, I would, but then I'd be lying to you.

Ironic isn't it.

Lying is the thing that is bad for us, but when we are hit with the cold, hard truth it's good for us.

Sometimes we'd be better off to hear lies, then maybe life won't hurt us so hard.

A lot of girls my age turn to things that reality offers them, alcohol, cocaine, meth, stupid things that shorten your life.

I was introduced to a truth that was good, it kept my head screwed on straight and my mind from wanting to totally give up.

I had a perfect life.

That was before he showed up in my life, before he locked his beautiful, mind blowing hazel brown eyes with mine.

That was before I realized that five small, brief minuets with this talkative guy, I'd be falling love with him in just a few months.

He's the kind of guy that when you'd lay your eyes on him, he'd have you captured from that moment on.

The one when you two first hold hands, it's an everlasting hold.

That when you first kiss it's never ending tingling in the pit of your stomach.

That was before "That Summer" the summer that drove a fine line between the two of us.

Now he's nothing but an old, stained up photo in a shoe box of his things to me, the very photo that you spent all your night sobbing over top of, watching as your tears dripped onto and caused to wrinkle it.

My once best friend and also first love was none other than James Maslow, the one I will never let go.

It started out just like any summer, days that felt a life time long, the smell of freshly cut grass, the warm breeze, birds singing to a lovely tune. That's when we found each other, and we found ourselves.

* * *

_Following day;_

"Dang do I love summer heat" James exclaimed, peeking out the rims of his ray bands starring at the group of girls in skimpy bikini bottoms.

"California girls, nothing is better than that" His friend Kendall piped in, as he let out a sigh.

I was never one of the bikinis on the beach type of girls, in fact I hated the beach, yet here I am sitting on my beach towel in Malibu roasting in the heat.

Kendall rolled his eyes at James before he began to speak. "What you've got to be kidding! Look at girl number 4, did you not see the size of her-"

But before Kendall could finish his sentence he was interrupted by a dark haired girl in shorts and a tank top.

She looked to be at least eighteen, maybe seventeen. Everything about her was perfect, right down to her luscious figure Kendall finally got a good look at the girl trying to talking to me.. She was so little. She was slightly smaller than him, but only a couple inches shorter.

She looked like if He squeezed her too hard, she'd snap in half. She had long brown hair that curled into flawless ringlets. the darkest brown eyes and a small smile finished off her look.

Kendall was quick to fall out of his day dreaming when she began to speak….it wasn't really speaking, it was more like screaming.

"What the heck is the matter with you and your friend!?" Katie yelled at the blonde and the brunette in front of her.

"I didn't come here to listen to you and your friend gawk and favor girls on a beach, for crying out loud they're human beings not objects, so please do me and the rest of the girls at this beach a favor and shut up. If you think that's how you're going to get a girl you're going to be single for the rest of your life."I say, before I trudge back to my beach blanket incredibly upset.

"Wow, someone is sensitive." Kendall exclaimed before giving Courtney a glare, and turning his direction to James who had his jaw opened slightly.

" Oh my god," James said, He looked at Katie again then back to Kendall.

"That was Katie" James whispered as he remembered the girl he used to be best friends with years ago. His features softened, keeping his gaze on her, he couldn't wrap his head around the fact that his former best friend was in the same state as he still, and merely just feet away.

"James...James...JAMESSSS!" Logan, James' other friend screamed, as he waved his arms frantically trying to get James' attention.

"Get your head screwed on straight, I asked if you wanted to go surfing. Do you?" Kendall chimed in as he took a gulp of water.

"No, no, you guys go, I'm going to stay back for a little bit, I'll be in the water later." James told his friends. They all shrugged their shoulders and made their way towards the water.

"Sorry about earlier, my friend doesn't know when to keep his mouth shut." James joked, as he took a seat next to Katie.

"And you had nothing to do with that conversation either? I can see something's haven't changed since the last time I saw you." She scuffed as she gave him a glare.

"Problem?" He retorted, James eyes immediately fell on her behind his ray bans.

"Other than the fact you just blew your friends off to come over and try to make small talk with someone who still hates you, I mean why am I not surprised that you still blow people off "

"Oh please, once again it was entirely my fault. God forbid you never attempted to make contact with me before then." He said getting agitated

"Well I would have if your mouth wasn't plastered to every girls mouth all the time, And besides it's not like our friendship back then was real anyway!"

"Maybe you should accept the fact that I'm trying to apologize for what happened three years ago and try and work things out between us and maybe you wouldn't be so bitchy all of a sudden."

"I have accepted it. But guess what James; I accepted reality right after I watched you drop me in the dust back in the 8th grade. So you know what? You can take your fake apology and shove it right where it came from." She got up and grabbed her belongings before stomping her feet in the sand and walking away.

Nothing that came in my mind made sense, my eyes became blurred as I felt the tears begin to fall from my eyes thinking back to the last time I saw him back in the ninth grade where everything started to fall apart….the last time I saw my _best friend._

_"How did this happen James?" I rolled over and looked at my best friend. He continued to look at the sky._

_"I never wanted this to end, you know that. But….maybe that's what needs to happen." He whispered _

_I could feel the tears pricking my but I ignored it. "Just promise me you won't forget who I am to you, and we'll pick up right where we left off."_

_"I promise….."_

After only a few months of him moving away I had gotten a text from my friend telling me she saw him in San Francisco with another girl, when I called him to ask if it were true he said yes without any hesitation and told me we could no longer be friends, I would cry for what seemed for days, my mom didn't ask what was wrong, she just knew. A little after two months his calls became less frequent, our video calls cut short.

The memory subsided as I began to feel my breathing hitch, yet I still ignored James shouts, calling me to come back.

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	2. Summer of nights

**So sorry for not updating! Thank you for the reviews, I'll be posting the next chapter hopefully tonight! But please give me feed back..even if it's just a smiley face! I love reading your reviews and I hope to see some new ones before I post the next chapter!**

"Come on Katie, don't do this" James pleads, trying to keep up with her pace.

"Do what James? Walk away? It took me three years to get use to the fact that I lost my boyfriend who was also my best friend because he had to move, and I understood that you didn't have a say in the matter but what I don't understand is what happened to us? What happened to picking up where we left off? What happened to _that summer_?"

James didn't say anything except look at the sand beneath his feet; he couldn't help but feel horrible for everything that screwed up the two best friends lives that summer.

"That's what I though." She whispered beginning to feel her own voice crack with emotion as she walked away from him.

* * *

_Katie_:

Have you ever wished that you could freeze a moment and keep it forever? I caught the perfect moment, just before it flew away on outstretched wings, and locked it in my heart; a heart full of rich colors – red, orange, yellow pink, purple and another color I just can't seem to place.

The color of a miracle, perhaps? I don't know. All I know is that the moment I chose to keep and treasure forever was the memory of just walking down the beach….

The sun was warm on my face, evaporating all my bad feelings, lifting my sorrows, lightening my heart and emptying my soul of all I knew. The sand stretched alongside me; white and pure. Only the forgotten footprints left behind remained, except for the debris and a few shells that were scattered among the footprints, as if they were scattered among the footprints, as if they had been sprinkled, just for decoration.

I could taste the salt –ground up sorrows; fear not yet forgotten. I could taste the bitterness of all the bad thoughts, blowing in the light summer breeze.

The debris lay around on the outstretched sandy beach as though it had been thrown over somebody's shoulder in disdain; it lay hopelessly, waiting for someone's love to spill. It lay, waiting for some love to reach their aching souls. It was a skeleton of what had been once beautiful –together; it was a skeleton of life.

I could hear the lost cried of the sulking gulls, the echoes of happy laughter. I heard my aching heart, rising and falling; waiting.

The waves sparkled and glittered playfully, splashing over my feet. They were happy then; calm and gentle; leaving behind their endless potential to destruct unfulfilled.

I picked up the curved and twisted shell that was lying by my feet; I placed the shell upon my waiting ear. I heard the voices of a thousand years, holding songs, thoughts, memories, joys, stories, and broken hearts. A miracle was preserved in intricate beauty, protected by the water –_forever_.

The salty air burnt my nose; stinging the thoughts inside my head; sending shivers down my spine. I smelt the eerie mystery left behind the sand dunes.

The water held so many unknown wonders; breathtaking beauty. Hidden secrets held close –kept safe. All this beauty and wonder , continuing until it met the sky and all the secrets and dreams began to take flight –let loose, into the open, awaiting skies.

My eyes followed the blue water, resting on the sunset sleeping peacefully on the horizon. For once, good and evil were equal and serene. There are no words to describe how I melted into the sunset; the perfect moment of mistakes and achievements.

* * *

"You always told me you hated the beach." A deep voice whispered, causing my head to jerk up and be met by a dark figure.

It was James, he was almost a head taller than me, my eye level was looking at his perfect lips which opened in a beautiful smile that I wish I, myself owned. It revealed perfect, white teeth. He was wearing a black sweatshirt with a safety pin as a zipper pull. He also wore slightly tattered jeans and a pair of black and white DC shoes. I sucked in a breath trying to calm my emotions that seemed to suddenly want to lash out. I said nothing and turned my attention back to the open waters. I had nothing to say to him.

"Some friends and I actually spent the entire day here surfing, we're thinking of maybe having a fire when it gets a little darker." James says, trying to make conversation, but to his dismay instead all he gets is a small nod from her.

"Please, Katie say something anything!" He pleaded.

"I should have never trusted you." I say in a whisper. I regret the words I used when I look out the corner of my eye, his face fell and his dark brown eyes looked the same as my heart…._.broken_

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	3. Summer of memories

**HEY GUYS! ****_IMPORTANT: I'm posting one last chapter tonight (this one) and if you like it and want me to continue leave a review...I'm asking for at LEAST 3 reviews on this chapter before I post another...soooo when this chapter gets three reviews I'll update_****Also, In this chapter you'll be learning ALOT about James...and why the two broke up, and also alot about there relationship...I'm especially proud of this chapter, it's my favorite one that I've written so far and I really hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it... **

_James:_

Her words were like small paper cuts, as much as I wish it wasn't true, she was right, she should have never trusted me, she had every right to be angry at me, and shut me out of her life for good, I was her best friend, she trusted me with her life and I failed. I couldn't help but feel worthless knowing how I had let things get so out of control between us, the fights we had back when we were younger weren't worth loosing my best friend, I blamed myself for what happened, because it was my fault. And Katie was the one who had to pick up the pieces from the relationship I had shattered in only one night.

_A friendship we had for almost ten years…..gone._

_A friendship built on trust….. Broken,_

I had broken so many promises that night to her and now, they were all coming back into mind like a sudden jolt of electricity forever leaving an imprint of those memories in my head that would replay over and over before I go insane.

"I keep wondering what I had done to you that night, what I said to make you do what you did, I keep wondering who the person I knew and loved went. You vanished right in front of my eyes." She spoke, sending another rush of guilt through my body.

* * *

I have always felt the responsibilities of my own mistakes and lack of judgments. I never really saw how they affected people, I only saw how they affected me, whether it was drama, or a break up, or what not. Maybe that's really self-centered of me, but it never really bothered me until this point. After I broke up with Katie, I had a streak of just being around the wrong people. I honestly didn't think about my actions, and I thought I'd be fine hiding them to myself and away from everyone else.

Over this summer I started seeing how these poor decisions ended up coming around to bite me in the butt. It put a pretty big rift between a good friend of mine, and made things awkward for me. But even this wasn't close to what I found out was happening to Kaite as a result of what I did almost 3 summers ago. She didn't tell me for a while, but there were something's that didn't seem quite right. When she finally told me that she knew that I had been seeing another girl, I felt so broken and so helpless. While I didn't directly mean to hurt her, she ended up getting hurt as an indirect way to get back at me.

I hated myself that much more for not only what I did, but seeing her pay for my actions. I started realizing that the things I choose to do, don't just affect me and my little world. They affect other people, maybe slightly for some, maybe a lot for others. I realized I couldn't just _do_ whatever I wanted, because there would always be some kind of reaction to every action, whether positive or negative. Words can not express how sorry I was, and still am to her.

"I'm sorry for hurting you. I didn't mean for that to happen. You were the first one to show me love, true love. I know you will probably hate me forever. But please be happy again. You are truly an amazing girl Katie."

I waited so long to hear those words. Weeks, months, and now, after almost three years you finally say them, I should be wrapped in your embrace right now, but I'm not, because sometimes sorry isn't enough, sometimes nothing is enough.I fell in _love_, _watched_ it grow, _watched_ it change, and _watched_ it fall apart"

With that, Katie took her hand and swept it over his cheek, admiring the boy who caused so much pain, but also caused happiness and joy her entire life. She let a small tear slip through her glistened eyes before taking a step back and walking away.

* * *

Having to watch her walk away, no support, no compassion, loneliness, no love in my life, depression, and a multitude of other negative things will happen sometimes, some people, no matter how much they love one another, it doesn't work out. Is it bad luck, bad karma, or just life, who knows? It doesn't make sense does it?

Is it better to keep the love I have and endure what life has dished out, so we both can be sad, or is it better to want more for her, and leave so she can begin anew? Its worse thing life is giving me. But I do understand why it is necessary. Only once in my life, I truly believe, I found someone who can completely turn my world around. I tell them things that I have never actually shared with another soul and she absorbed everything I said and actually want to hear more. I shared hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at me.

When something wonderful happened, I couldn't wait to tell her about it, knowing she'd share in my excitement. She was never embarrassed to cry with me when I was hurting, or laugh with me when I would make a complete fool out of myself. Never did she hurt my feelings or make me feel like I wasn't good enough, but rather; she built me up and showed me the things about myself that made me special. There was never any pressure, jealousy, or competition, but only a quiet calmness when we were around one and another. I could be myself and not worry about what she would think of me because she _loved_ me for who I _was_. The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song, or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in my heart to cherish forever. Memories of our childhood come back and are so clear and vivid; it's like being young again. Colors seem brighter and more brilliant. Laughter seemed to be part of daily life where, now, it's infrequent, and sometimes doesn't exist at all. A phone call or two during the day always helped to get through a long day's work and always brought a smile to my face. Things that never interested me before about her become fascinating because I now know they are important to Katie, who is so special to me. I think of her now on every occasion and in everything I do. Simple things bring her to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind, or even a storm cloud on the horizon. She opened her heart knowing that there's a chance it may be broken one day and trusting me and opening her heart to me I shattered it, and in the process I shattered a friendship.

It was over an hour after Katie had left that I was still at the beach, I don't really know why I'm still here, but it was the sky that compelled me to stay, and I also had so much on my mind, things that I wanted to fix, change, re do. So I just sit here on the beach running my fingers through the cool, gritty sand, listening to the supple roar of the ocean, and I begin to feel myself being enveloped with the chilly, moist ocean breeze The beach is fun during the day, a place for recreation. Swim, surf, fish and tan. But the beach isn't very interesting as it sits under the sun. It is much more beautiful and peaceful at night, and a good place to just sit and think. . This night, while I sit on the beach thinking of how I can possibly make it right with her, or if I can even make it right. I felt like I was lying on my bed trying to fall asleep. I was in my dark room under my cool sheets. The waves were notes of soft music. The breeze was the soft wind of the air vent. And there were stars. They were all tiny lights you can see at night: the little green dot on the computer monitor, the glow of the alarm, the blinking midnight clock on the stereo that I never bother to set.

I turned to my left and noticed an empty beer can, evidently the sign that said;

"NO DRINKING" was simply ignored by whose ever beverage that was.

I stopped drinking, pretty much for good, over two years ago. Because alcohol was the reason She and I had broken up in the first place, we had gotten into a terrible fight we argued about the very common thing about us—her parents, and me moving almost five hours away, the hatred her parents had towards me. her mom did not like me for her.

The reason is that we were still young and we had o permanent jobs yet to create our own lives in the future. At this point, we were still finishing High School. But nevertheless, we still tried to keep in touch through all the barriers in our relationship; although, the barriers became worse. Whenever I called her at home, her parents would say that She was "_not around_" even though she just stayed there the whole day.

And then we got into a heated argument about her sociology partner whom she had been spending so much of her time with, I became jealous knowing he was with her for almost three hours every week day and sometimes even longer, I started to accuse her of having feelings for him when she started to call off dates to see him and I started making false accusations of her dating with him behind my back.

I had little to no trust in her, Because of what happened; I started being cold and uneasy. I got mad easily, I got annoyed easily.

When she had declined my offer of taking her out for dinner one night, because we hadn't had a real date night since she had met with her new sociology class mate, I had gotten so angry at her, the argument ended with me raising my voice at her which I had never done and slamming the front door, in result her in tears.

I felt as if she was lying to me, telling me she didn't have feelings for him, I thought she did, and that's when nothing my head was making sense except for the overwhelming temptation for alcohol. I had gone to the bar and gotten myself completely shit faced a really hot girl asked in a way that could only be called overtly flirty what I wanted to drink.

" 2 Shots of 151?" I said in the hesitant way I still have, knowing that's about as big a buzz kill of an answer as one can provide, since I've also sworn off Diet Coke.

"I've got the entire night," I tried to joke.

Two shots turned into four shots, and then the numbers began to double drastically, the entire time I had the girl next to me cheering me on getting drunk her own self drunk as well, we shared a kiss, and one thing led to another. The next thing I knew I was laying in some cheap hotel bed with the worst hang over in my life and a blonde girl beside me sleeping.

_**DON'T FORGET TO REVIEW THIS CHAPTER!**_


	4. Summer of friends

**Well hello my wonderful readers here is another chapter hope you like it! Don't forget to review and check out my other stories much love…now…..ONTO THE STORY!**

* * *

**_Katie:_**

I turned over and looked at my alarm clock and I began to groan silently to myself as the red numbers flashed _3;37am_. I pulled the chain on my lamp so I could see, before I opened my closet door to reveal the large clutter of mix matched, shoes, and clothes piled high like a pyramid.

_"I mine as well make good use of my time and clean this thing considering I can't seem to fall asleep." _I thought to myself.

I cam across a small show box, and to my very own surprise it had random crap inside of it. Not like garbage but like..memerable crap from when James and I had dated. Movie stubs, dinner receipts, photos, old love letters we'd write to one and another in home-room back in high school. Even a rose petal in a small plastic bag sealed tight from our first anniversary we ever shared together. Anything that linked to our relationship was stored in that small tampered box.

I began to take each thing out examining it closely, each one had a story behind it, a memory I'd cherish in my heart for eternity. My fingers then traced over a black Hollister sweatshirt, it was James' black Hollister sweatshirt.

Picking up the cotton fabric I pressed it against my chest. James had given me that weeks before he had moved, giving me something to remember him by. It no longer smelled like him, rather it smelt like dust.

I fell asleep that night clutching onto his sweatshirt, the shirt pressed against me tightly as small tears rolled down my check, as much as I hated to admit it..I missed the _one person_ I called my _best friend_…I missed _him_..I missed my _boyfriend_….I missed _James Diamond._

* * *

I slowly open my eyes, shutting them quickly when I see the light shine brightly through my open window. I cover my face with my pillow groaning loudly that I have to go into work today. I quietly make my way down the carpeted stars and into the kitchen where you can see my year old black lab, Dakota, sleeping peacefully by the patio door.

I laugh lightly to myself before grabbing a blueberry bagel and popping it into the toaster.

As I turn around I see Jade, my room-mart and also one of my closest and craziest best friends walk into the kitchen holding a star bucks coffee cup in one hand and in the other a raspberry muffin.

She smiles at me as she sits down at the kitchen table, slowly taking a sip of her hot steaming coffee., I return the smile before I go back to getting my bagel, I stick half of the hot bagel into my mouth as I head to the door grabbing my car keys out of my purse, starting my car and driving away.

"How is Katie this Thursday afternoon.?" Kyle my assistant manager politely asks as he gives me a small friendly smile as he sweeps the black and white checkered flooring beneath our feet.

"Can't complain Kyle, can't complain." I joke as I place the name tag onto my apron.

"Table ten needs more coffee , now Katie don't start slacking yet, you've only been here for a week."

"That's right, because slacking on the job is your duty right?" I snicker before grabbing the coffee pot and making my way over to the table.

"Katie?" A voice says aloud, causing me to jerk my head in the direction of the voice.

"Logan?!" I reply in the same excited and surprised tone before we both went to hug one and other tightly.

"It' so great to see you Katie,!" Logan exclaimed before pulling her into another bone crushing hug.

"We haven't seen each-other since what? The 5th grade, your mom never said anything about you coming to California!" Katie says with a smile plastered on her beautiful face.

" I didn't know I was coming to the sunny state until late Monday night, I guess my mom and dad are thinking of selling our old vacation house in Malibu and I thought of maybe buying it and moving up here myself." Logan explained.

"Oh my gosh! Logan that's fantastic! Listen I've got a lot of work to do but I'll give you call later and we can catch up." I say as I scribble my cell phone number on a napkin and handing him it.

"It's a date." Logan says before giving me one last hug and begins his way out the door, a smile still on my face. I still couldn't believe one of my best friends were actually moving to California I was beyond happy!

* * *

**_Okay guys how did you like it? I know it wasn't really long but I thought I should update I promise the next chapter will be longer and please review and let me know what you think and until next time..._**

xoxo

~btrfanfictions1516 (;


	5. Summer of falls

**All right, before I begin the story I'd like to clear a few things up. I noticed a few of you were saying you had gotten confused with the whole Kendall/Katy thing… so first off I'd like to apologize for the confusion. I noticed the second chapter Kendall was introduced. And that's when it got kind of confusing because I didn't specify if they were strangers or siblings. I'm going to change that chapter and have it be a different friend of James instead of it being Kendall…..because I think if Kendall and Katy were siblings the story would work out better. ****If you guys have any questions or ideas for what you'd like to see happen in the story ****don't be shy to message me or tell me in a review. If you are not comfortable reviewing as a registered one please review as a guest (:**

* * *

Katy;

I still couldn't believe my best friend is moving out here, it'd be great to have someone to talk to again. Ever since James and I had broken up I haven't really talked to Carlos, Logan and even Kendall my own brother! Kendall acts as if I was never related to him, heck he acts like we never even met before. It was upsetting when it first happened. Of course, having to deal with the love of your life walking out on you is upsetting as well, and having your friends walk away too…well that was even worse. I hated being alone, I hated how things turned out, some days I wished none of that had happened.

I wished I had never told James how I really felt for him.

I wished we never shared a kiss.

Because if none of that had happened, I'd still have my brother, my friends, my life…even if it meant I wouldn't have had James, at least it meant I wouldn't be alone and suffering from a broken heart still.

"Hey Kit-Kat!" I heard Logan say into the phone making a smile form across my face for the first time that day, it was a real smile, it wasn't fake like how most of smiles have been.

"What's up Logie Bear." I say back into the phone in a happy tone before plopping onto my kind sized mattress getting comfortable.

" Un-packing my stuff, so hey listen, I know we didn't really have time to catch up earlier so I was thinking if you wanted to come over later tonight, I'm throwing a small party and it'd mean a lot to have you come."

I bit my lip slightly as I began to think, I wanted to see him, I really did, but I also didn't want to run into James. But something was telling me to go, that if I didn't I'd regret it.

"Okay, I'll be there." I say back into the phone, still second guessing if I should decline the offer.

I could tell Logan was smiling even though I couldn't see him, and knowing that made me forget my ever regret saying yes. We talked a for a little while longer about our families back in Texas and all the amazing things California would have in store for him. We'd laugh every now and then as we'd remembered all the crazy things we did back in our home State. Sadly the conversation was cut short after only a half hour later when he had to tell me he better start getting the house ready for tonight. We said our goodbyes and just as quick as the conversation went the conversation ended with a push of a red button on my I phone.

* * *

I started rummaging through my closet sorting through the racks of clothing trying to figure out what I should wear. I decided on a dark purple V-neck, paired with dark washed jeans and flip flops. I headed into the bathroom and put my hair into a high pony tail before I touched up on some mascara and lip stick. I still had an hour and a half to kill before I would be leaving so I grabbed some nail polish and started doing my nails.

"Cool party!" I manage to scream over the loud thumping music as I make my way towards Logan. I was glad there was no sign of James.

"You made it!" He said in return as he gave me a small hug with his free hand, the other was holding an alcoholic drink. "Can I get you a drink?" He asked motioning his hand to the variety of beverages on table just feet away from where we were both standing.

I shook my head no, telling him I'd get some in a little while. He nodded his head in understandment before he excused himself so he could go greet the other guests. I haven't been to his family's vacation house since I was a little girl so I took the time to take it all in; each room I passed had some kind of memory in it. I made my way down the hall and up the creaking stairs. You could only hear the faint sounds of music and laughter. I entered the first room I saw. And of course it was my favorite. I loved sitting in here and reading the many books that were surrounded in the small library. I'd sit in it for hours by myself soaking in all the wonders, reading books were always one of my favorite things to do, and it still is. My fingers brushed over a large wooden book case that was filled with old books and picture frames from the years that passed. I picked one up and studied it as a wave of memories flooded my mind.

"Kate, you coming'?" I heard Logan's voice says, startling me. I jerked my head away from the picture and towards his face before nodding and following him downstairs.

* * *

I ended up taking shots with some guy named Peter, maybe his name was Cameron, I don't remember, I was on my ninth shot of whisky when I became suddenly sick to my stomach, I scanned the room looking for Logan so I could ask him if he had any other drink that didn't involve alcohol.

Each step I took, the more my legs turned into jello and my eyes more blurred, I managed to step outside into the fresh air, hoping that it would help the horrible sensation that was erupting in my insides.

It was a different sensation- rough, harsh painful.

My consciousness was encapsulated in a flesh body and I was falling, really falling. My hair lashed from my face. My skin felt the movement

My nervous system tingling and the inner ear's balance registering that downwards motion

I twisted in the hope of slowing the fall.

I attempted to grasp anything that I could to avoid the sudden stop but I found nothing. The air rushed through my lungs,

my bones shuddered, my muscles contracted as I hit something.

The falling was over. I had landed on something flat and cold. I contorted and bellowed in pain as my body came in contact with it

I wasn't falling.

I hit, not as hard as I expected, then almost instantly I was on cold hard cement, my knees up tight against my chest in doing so, released only one soft whimpering tone through my ground teeth. This level of pain was beyond words.

"Katie? Is that you" Something warm wrapped it's self around my waist and pulled itself across the cement floor to curl around me creating a wall of breathing warmth.

The pain tightened me and with each failed breath it got tighter. Biting and cutting into my existence as it held me captive.

"Breathe Katie. Hold on. Please hold on!" The distant voice seemed concerned.

With sudden movement the warmth was gone. The chill spread across my body.

Something was shoving me. Pushing me into my back, the warm strong hands ripped my arms free, yanking them from their grip around my knees, and then my legs were unceremoniously pulled from my chest where they had been drawn up

Something was forcing me out of my ball.

Now air found its way into my lungs only to be screamed out again

"Breathe deeply, this will take the pain away" The voice reassured me

Air found its way into my lungs as they expanded and contracted on their own leaving me on a soft fluffy cloud of confusion

I tried to focus my eyes. Blurry dark images silhouetted in the bright moonlight.

Blinking to try to force my focus I concentrated on the one shape that was moving. Whatever the voice did to me it was good because it took away the pain. I had no pain. No pain, nothing. I clenched and released my fists, no, nothing. Wow

"Katie, can you understand anything I am saying? He spoke softly, but the fear in his voice resonated.

I stared at him as the blurry lines slowly became clearer. He looked familiar

The dark brown hair, those clear brown eyes, and his mouth so beautiful - if only it had a smile on it-yes, familiar.

My hand found its way to his face, "James? Is that you?"

"Yes Katie its James. I'm here. How many fingers am I holding up?" He was speaking slowly. Too slowly. And he was holding up four fingers and looking at me expectantly

"Don't be a jerk," I breathed my annoyance at him then attempted to swat his hand away. "Or I will give you one finger to count! After all of "that" you patronize me? Seriously?"

"Who….what are you talking about, I'm making sure you're okay, I. . . .I saw you fall."

"I'm fine, now let go of me." I say in a harsh tone as I try to rip his hands off my arms.

"No Katie, you're not okay, I know you aren't stop fooling yourself." James whispers sympathetically.

"Don't tell me what I'm feeling and not feeling James!" I spat in pure anger

"Stop lying to me Katie. I know you; I know when you're hurting, what's wrong?"

"No you don't know me." She screamed, hot tears flooding her eyes making her eye make-up smear.

James furrowed his eyebrows as if he was confused and hurt before he began to say.

"I know that you never liked heights, you never liked Vanilla ice-cream, you always loved watching the sun set."

I didn't say anything I just looked at the ground as he continued speaking.

"Do you remember summer '09, Lying on the beach as the sun blew out I was playing the guitar by the fire to loud. Under the moonlight as we stared at the sea. The words you whispered I will always believe. It was the first time you said you would always love me." He whispered the last few words before turning his head away trying to keep his composure so he wouldn't cry.

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**_ I really hope I get some review...it took almost 3 hours to do thissss...ahhhhhhh :P So review PLEASEEE_**


	6. Summer of calls

Sorry for not posting..I just want to tell you guys how much I appreciate every single one of you! I love seeing your reviews they make me smile! Much love to all my reviewers, readers, silent readers,followers,favoriters,and alerters.. this chapter is for you (: 5+ comments for the next much love!

* * *

"Is everything alright out here?" I hear Logan's voice ask, I silently thank the heavens that someone had come at just the right time.

"I just lost my balance, that's all." I fake a laugh, completely ignoring James' last question.

"I'll help you clean up that cut." Logan insisted drawing attention to my scraped knee. "And we should probably put some ice on you head, gravity really got you good huh?" He jokes, helping me up to my feet.

"I guess so." I reply, before taking his hand in mine. The look on James face is one of utter confusion. Either because he knew he lost this round to Logan. Or, because he spent the last five minutes trying to help but I refused. Either way, I know how James was, he wasn't the type to stop after a couple of tries. He was the driven type. He'd do anything and everything in his own power to get what he wanted. What can I say, he's a hockey player. Which meant he lived off winning.

* * *

The throbbing in my head stayed all through the night, I practically raided my entire medicine cabinet trying to find Tylenol to reduce the pain, but after minuets of destroying my entire kitchen looking, I knew for a fact that I was defiantly out of luck.

"So what exactly is the Tylenol for?" My friend Jessica questioned once I opened the front door for her. She was the only person I knew who would be awake at 1:30 in the freaking morning.

"Head ache." I say, shrugging my shoulders as I down the two small white tablets with a glass of ice water.

You doin' okay Kate?" Her voice changed from carefree Jessica, to instant Best Friend mode. "Uh-huh" I mumble before I take another sip of water hoping she'd get the hint that I didn't really want to talk about it. But the face she made told me that she wasn't going to buy it, so I caved.

"I..I honestly really don't know." I suddenly blurt out, feeling incredibly stupid that my friend could read me so well. I shifted from one foot to the other as I placed my side against the kitchen counter leaning on it.

"Maybe it's time to stop telling everyone you're okay and actually tell them the truth, I don't know what happen between James and you the summer you guys broke up. All I know is that you aren't the Katie I used to know back then. Evidently whatever did happen changed you."

* * *

*With James*

"Bro, it's 1:30 in the fricken morning, shouldn't you be, oh I don't know maybe sleeping like half of California is doing?" Logan huffed to his friend.

James gripped the metal back that placed firmly in-between his hands, keeping his focus before he lunged the metal bat forward. Hitting the baseball making a ping sound once the ball hit the bat. James always went to the batting cages when he had to let off steam, he tool ass his aggressions and anger out in that place. And tonight, well, that just so happen to be one of those nights. His knuckles were white from his hold, after a few seconds Logan heard another ping, signifying James had hit the ball again.

"Are you just going to continue to ignore me or are you going to explain to me why you needed to see me at this time of night."

"Katie." Was all James said taking a breath before smacking another baseball as hard as he could making him grunt from the force.

Logan didn't say anything, he knew James just wanted a friend to be there with him, not to talk, James never liked talking about his feelings, especially if it was about Katie.

"Summer of 2009, you remember that year?" James breathed out, before wiping the sweat that was building on his forehead and took a swig of his water bottle before getting back into place to his another fast ball.

"Yeah…..yeah I do."

"Then now you know why I called you hear then, huh?" James replied, giving his friend a quick look before going back to his focus on the machine.

* * *

*With Katie*

"I can't stay here, I can't continue to live like this, I miss James to much, I have a ticket to Texas my flight leaves in the morning, I'm going to stay with my family for a few months." Katie whispered trying to hold the tears.

"Kate…." Jessica trailed off giving her friend a sad look before pulling her into a friendly hug. "Does James know?"

Katie shook her head no. "I wasn't going to tell him." Katie could no longer let the tears held in her eyes, they started to stream down her cheeks, she didn't bother to wipe them away.

* * *

"I feel like he hasn't slept ever since Katie left," Kendall whispered, as He and Carlos observed their friend from the bedroom doorway.

"You know, I really want to ask him to go out with Logan and me tonight," Carlos whispered back. "I mean he's turned me down every time I've invited him out, when he used to _never _pass up the opportunity… but he hasn't even attempted to screw any girls for the past month and frankly, I don't want to ruin that no-slut streak." He raised his eyebrows. Yeah, they were _guys_, but they didn't particularly agree with James's type of style. But this eccentric state he had fallen into since he saw Katie again at the beach almost four months ago, worried them more.

"You know I can hear you guys." James said clearly annoyed, as he continued to lay on his side on his mattress. "Dumb asses." He muttered to himself, at their poor attempt at discretion.

James wasn't going to lie. He missed her more than words could express, just then his phone began to vibrate. He picked up his Iphone that was on his night stand. He looked at the screen before his eyes grew wide.

Katie.

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Awwww daaayyyy-ummm cliff hanger! Why do you think Katie is calling James? Will James pick up the phone? Tell me what you think will happen or should happen! **5+ comments for the next chapter! I know you guys can do it!..Review!**


	7. Summer of frustration

**(There is an important update that you need to read at the end of this chapter that has to do with this story, so I STRONGLY advise you to read it) **Hey guys the wait is over! Not much to say other then I'm really happy you guys like this story and I hope you guys continue to review :) onto the story!

* * *

James holds his gaze at the vibrating Iphone that is being held in his hand, wondering if he should pick it up or not, of course he should pick it up what is he thinking?

Yet again, he hasn't really been thinking for a while, that's how he got into the whole mess anyways. Because, well, he just wasn't _thinking, _that's how things got so effed with him and Katie. He slept with another girl, he needed something to numb the pain, it worked, it actually did numb the pain, but only temporarily. And when he was with Katie, he had no pain.

It took four more rings until James answered his phone. He inhaled a sharp and shaky breath bracing himself for what was yet to come.

"Hello?" He says, his voice slightly tense. _ Damn it! _He cursed silently to himself, as he listened to his pathetic voice and how vulnerable it sounded.

"I wanted you ." Katie deeply sighed before continuing, "I wanted you to be the last voice I listened to before I have to leave." She confessed in a hushed tone.

"Can you promise me something?" Katy asked hesitantly.

"Of course I can."

"Just please don't tell the others, especially Kendall where I am yet."

James let his head fall as a sigh escaped his parted lips. "Kate, do you know how much Kendall has been freaking out? Katy, he doesn't even know where you are and if you're even okay."

"So in other words you're saying you're saying you are going to tell them." She huffed.

"I never said that."

"So you won't tell them?"

"I never said that either."

Katie let out a frustrated sigh, clearly annoyed with James and his games. But before she had time to protest James's voice was being heard through the other line of the phone.

"I'm not doing this to be mean Katie, but if something did happen to you, I'd never be able to forgive myself for it because I could have been able to prevent It from happening in the first place."

James didn't press her as to where she was, and why she left, he just wanted to make sure the girl he'd give his life up for was safe.

James asked her the simple question, and she said she was staying at a friend's house. He let out a breath he had no idea he was holding.

They spoke for a few moments longer, no mention of if and when she was coming home was said from either of the two, other than the fact that she said she was going to be back sooner or later.

"I can't live here forever you know." She says into the phone trying to ease the tension between the two of them.

James lets out a small chuckle as he agrees with her, he glances at his alarm clock that reads 2:38am, sleep was the last thing on his mind at the moment,he closed his eyes, trying mesmerizing this very moment, but his head kept reliving all the things him and Katie had done in the past. It brought on a smile to his face even though he knew it might never happen again. He liked that he would have those moments with her forever, only he and Katie knew those memories, and no one could take it away from him.

Katie told him about of all she did that day, James couldn't help but acknowledge the nagging thought that stayed in the back of his mind that Katie was hiding something from him, that she wasn't really fine, he could tell by the way she spoke, she didn't sound like the usual Katie he knew, she sounded _different. _He shook the thought from his mind anyways and tried his best to focus on what Katie was telling him. He closed his eyes as he pictured how she would look like at this very moment.

Her hair in a low pony tail, her make-up washed off, revealing her natural beauty, that any boy would be blind not to find attractive, in a black tank top and soft fuzzy light blue pajama bottoms, lying on her bed, head resting comfortably against her pillow, he chest rising and falling as she breathed. Soon the thought of him lying next to her, his hands wrapped securely around her waist as he pulls her flush against his bare chest. _ No, stop it James. _He scolds himself as he tries to rid his thoughts….more like dreams about the brown haired beauty from his mind.

"I'm leaving tonight, with Kyle." Katie says, waiting for James to respond.

Kyle? As in Katies good for nothing abusive ex boyfriend she used to date a while back, why would she be leaving with Kyle, better yet, why would she be with Kyle? James was nothing but furious at the whole idea of her leaving with someone as horrible as Kyle.

"No, you're not." James tells her sternly

Katie lets out a fake laugh at his comment. "Excuse me? Uhm, I'm old enough to make my own decisions, and I'm leaving with Kyle." She said just as stern as James had a moment earlier.

"Katie, you know how Kyle is, you need to come home right now, I don't want to risk you getting hurt." James breathed into the phone.

"Oh look at you deciding to start caring about someone other than themselves for a change, you deserve a sticker."

"Katie just tell me where y-" He chucked his phone across the room making it slam against the wall as he realized she had hung up on him mid sentence. "Frick!" He growled to himself, as he set his head in his hands.

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**ATTENTION;**

**If you want me to continue please leave a review it can even be a smiley face, I need to know if you like it or want me to continue and reviews are the only way for me to know if you like the story and want me to continue SO PLEASE REVIEW THIS CHAPTER IT'S REALLY IMPORTANT THAT YOU DO!**


	8. Summer of crashes

**I just want to thank all the ones who reviewed that last chapter I was so happy to see all the wonderful things you had to say about the story thank you to the bottom of my heart!**

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Katie:

I turned to Kyle who was now picking up the last of my remaining bags from the kitchen floor that I had packed earlier in the day well he was at work. We put on our shoes and slipped out the now closed front door to his three bedroom apartment.

The air was crisp and cool. U could begin to feel the slight hint of breeze brush over my exposed skin as the both of us began to walk together into the darkness towards his car. The rush of the city traffic has died down a little, the smell of exhaust and sunlight rising from hot walls and sidewalks filled my nose as I breathed in the fumes of the August night.

I climbed into the passenger seat of Kyle's black SUV getting buckled in as he turned the key into the ignition, making the car hum to life, as a heavy rock song started to blast through the front speakers as we drove off into the night, forgetting about the city, the state and the memories. Good and bad that had come with it. I was ready to move on and let go, knowing in just a short amount of time I'd be in a new place able to start fresh again without anyone judging my past made me ecstatic inside and out.

I knew that keeping this kind of secret from everyone, including Kendall my very own brother, wasn't going to be a walk in the park, nor is it the smartest decision I've made. But being on my own felt like it was a huge, totally necessary step in separating me from my old, boring life. I feel like as long as I live at home, surrounded by Kendall's old hockey trophies and all the reminders of my old eight-hour collage schedule, (before I found out a few days ago I don't have enough money to even attend a collage) and James, constantly around to mag me, and Kendall who treats me like I'm still an eleven year old girl, I'd be stuck as the same old person, no matter what I did.

My thoughts were caught short as I realized how fast Kyle was going, because of our belated departure, he was going fast, too fast. We started down the first road to our destination. the miles long and filled with little hills. As we broke the top of one of the small, blind hills in the middle of the right lane was a dead deer. Without any thought, purely by instinct he pulled the wheel of the car to the left and back over to the right. No big deal but he was going fast. The car swerved back to the left, to the right, to the left. Each time I could feel the car scratching the earth with its side. My body jolted with the sporadic movements of the car. The car swerved to the right for the last time. With my eyes sealed tight, I could feel my body float off the seat of the car.

"Kyle." I say wearily, barely able to move my own mouth because it hurt t much to move.

Fear filled my mind as I lye on my side, sandwiched between the cold, soft dirt and the hot, slick metal of the car. The weight of the car pressed down on the lower half of my body with monster force. It did not hurt, my body was numb. All I could feel was the car hood's mass stamping my body father and farther into the ground. My lungs felt pinched shut and air would neither enter nor escape them. My mind was buzzing until my eyes began to droop, I could hear Kyles voice as it slowly began to drift away as I went into unconsciousness.

* * *

Kyle:

I opened my eyes to see the black road in the distance above me. I could feel the cold ground on the side of my body. I couldn't move and couldn't understand why. It had happened so quickly. I lay there until my mind comprehended what had happened. I was wedged between the hood of the car and the dirt. The car rustled, every movement of the car pierced my body. my eyes scanned the scene in front of me, glass spread over the road as I saw Katie lying unconscious against the dashboard. I opened my mouth to yell her name but air failed to escape my lips. Gasping like a fish out of water.

I pulled out my phone and began to dial someone, I knew I should call an ambulance, but I couldn't not yet.  
Only a few minuets passed by before I saw headlights come up the road stopping next to the car.

"What the heck happen!" The boy yelled as he ran up to me.

"There was a deer, just help me move her."

"Are you nuts? She could have a broken neck, you have to call the police." The guy said frantically as he looked at the unconscious body in front of him.

"NO! I screamed, we can't do that, I'd be sent to jail for all the drugs I have in the back seat, not to mention the load of cash I have, just help me move her into the drivers seat, we'll call an ambulance once we're away from the scene."

The boy only nodded before they took Katie and slid her into the drivers side. Kyle grabbed the bags of money and drugs before the two took off as he began to call an ambulance to come get Katie.

* * *

James:

"Or that other time when we ended up getting caught T- peeing our old English teacher back in high school." Kendall said laughing, as the others remembered the old memory. The boys just got done going to the movies so they were still on there way home.

"She deserved it though, she was a total bitch." Logan said, taking a sip of his cherry coke.

"She was reme-." James stopped mid-sentence as Kendall slammed on his breaks swerving into the other lane, barely missing the flipped car."

"WHAT THE FRICK!" Logan hollered as the car came to a stop and Kendall was looking as if he was going to have an asthma attack of something.

The four boys quickly got out of the car and ran over to the flipped car, the headlights were still on.

"I think someone is in there!" Kendall said crouching down.

"Don't move them, they could have something broken." Logan responded, as his doctor instincts kicked into full swing

"Oh my God, oh my God!" Kendall began to repeat over and over, each time his voice began to break more and more with every word "Someone call an ambulance, IT'S KATIE!"

James' eyes grew wide before he ran over to the car in panic as he saw all the blood and gashes, as Carlos wipped out his phone dialing 911.

It felt as if James couldn't breathe or move. He just sat there, looking at the frail body of his best friend that he loved.

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**I UPDATED THE LAST CHAPTER AND IT WILL EXPLAIN WHO KYLE IS AND EVERYTHING! DON'T FORGET TO REVIEW THIS CHAPTER!**


	9. Summer of diving

I feel like a jerk for not posting in a while..but anyways, here is a long chapter to hopefully make up for it (: **DON'T FORGET TO REVIEW!**

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Katie

I wake up, in a hospital bed, with IV's in my arms and tubes up my nose. I panic, wondering what in God's name just happened. I rip the IV's and tubes out, and attempt to walk out of the room. Difficult to walk, I grasp my aching side, which felt rough, somewhat bumpy. My hand reached up slowly. My head had bandages all over, and my hair had dried blood. That's when my ribs started hurting. At first, I didn't mind it because it was so tiny, I thought it would go away. But then it started aching more and more like my bones were broken. I barely made it out the door of my hospital room when I was caught by three nurses.

I began to panic, trying with all I had in me to break free from them. I didn't know why I was in the hospital.

"No…no just let me go!" I screamed at them, tears falling now.

"Kate, calm down, it's okay!" I heard a worried voice call our from the otherside of the hospital. I turned my attention towards where the voice was and saw a concerned James jogging over to me.

"Help me..p..please." I sob out. "I don't know why I'm here." By the time the words were out of my mouth James was next to me stroking my cheek.

"Shhh, just calm down beautiful, everything's okay, you just need to calm down." He whispered softly. My eyes grew wide and yelped in pain when I felt a needle be injected into my left arm. "James…" I say, looking into his eyes that were staring down at me.

Everything began to slow down and become quiet. "Everything will be okay, I'll see you when you wake up." I hear him say to me as I slowly let the darkness take over me.

I'm yet again awken by the damn beeping noises from the machines. I turn my head wearily to the side where James is next to me reading a book. His gaze shifts from the pages to my own and a smile lights up his face. "Finally awake sleeping beauty?" He jokes, setting the book down. "Uh, Kendall just left, he went to go grab some lunch he should be back soon..I'm probabley the last person you wanted to see when you woke up, if you…if you want me to leave I ca-"

"NO!"…I say, I hate how I sound so desperate as I say this to him. "Please stay with me." I tell him, grasping his arm, pleading

A small smile forms on his lips as he nods He sitting back down, keeping his eyes on me.

I instantly blush a bright red, and a smile forms on me once I see him staring at me, and I look away in embarrassment, causing him to let a soft chuckle from his mouth.

"You're so beautiful when you get embarrassed." He tells me, only to make me smile bigger.

"I'm not embarrassed." I say, tucking a small strand of my hair behind my ear not looking at him directly.

"You'd always do that hair thing, when we were dating whenever I gave you a compliment." He says, a hint of sadness in his voice.

I'm hit with a pang of guilt as he says that. "James." I say quietly

"I'm sorry, it's just I really miss y-"James was cut off when I hear a familiar voice.

"Hey baby sister, I got you some subway." Kendall says walking into the room, clearly oblivious that James was telling me something.

"Best brother. EVER!" I tell him as I take the sandwich he hands me.

"Sorry James, what were you saying?" I ask, licking my thumb that is now covered in sauce.

James turns his attention to Kendall for a split second before saying. "Nothin, forget I said anything." He tells me coolly.

"Well if you're sure." I say, god I sound like such a bitch.

"I need some air." James says kicked the chair from under him, making it screech against the polished floor and stepping out the door. Kendall raises an eyebrow at me. "Okay, what's happening between you and James?" Kendall asks, sitting on the edge the hospital bed.

I let out a shaky breath before setting down my sandwhich, folding my hands in my lap.

"The thing that's happening is that I Katie Knight is falling back in love with the boy I was never supposed to have feelings for again…..and I'm falling really hard."

Kendall doesn't say anything except nod his head understandingly.

**_James_**

I walked out of the hospital, hands shoved in my pockets as I stared clueless up at the stars that surrounded the area, the atmosphere was basically dead, huh weird, same thing with my heart.

My mind wandered as I remembered the first time I kissed her. Under the stars.

Flash back

_ She said she wanted to go cliff diving, only this time she would be with a lifeguard at her side. Yep—you got it—yours truly. James Maslow. Who else would be dumb enough to tempt fate?_

_"Jeez, Kit-Kat, you'd think you were packing for the weekend." Wishful thinking, huh?_

_"Well, smarty pants, I like to be prepared for anything. "_

_"If I had to carry around that much junk, I'd need a fricken cart," I laughed. Katie just glared at me._

_Okay, so it was probably a girl thing to bring every freakin' damn item with you wherever you went.  
_

_She threw her shit on the ground and finally removed her towel. I closed my eyes for a second I heard her shriek, as I opened them again. I got ready to catch her as she fell—and she landed right into..._

_not _

_in_

_my _

_arms? _

_fuck!  
_

_Katie sputtered as the cold water splashed in her face. ""You told me you'd catch me!" She screamed once she resurfaces  
_

_LATER THAT NIGHT_

_"Aren't you suppose to kiss a girl before she leaves?"_

_"What did you just say?"  
_

_"I'm asking you to kiss me, stupid!"_

_And then,, Logan came running up the front steps—as usual._

_"Hey Ja- Oh...opps Sorry, man, I didn't know you had company."_

_"It's okay, Logan I probably should be heading home anyway. It's getting late."_

_I separated quickly from her and went out to the truck to get her stuff._

_I took her home and the day ended with a goodnight kiss._

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**THE REVIEW BUTTON IS LOOKING A LITTLE COLD AND LONELY..BE A GOOD READER AND WARM IT UP AND VISIT HIM?**** I hope you liked this chapter...and I hope you enjoyed the flashback :) LEAVE A REVIEW AND TELL ME WHAT YOUR FAVORITE PART WAS!**


	10. Summer of forgivness

_Hey guys, I'm here with another chapter! Yayyy please leave a review..Thanks for the love on the last one lets see if we can keep the love going so leave a review anon or not I want to here what you have to say about the story!_

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I can't stand being all cooped up, I've been stuck inside since I got home from the hospital, and that was almost a week ago. Kendall wanted me to stay with him for a while, and since then; big brother mode kicked in at full swing. I' m pretty much on his radar 24/7. Even when I was grounded by mom when I had managed to sneak out of the house after curfew to go to some party back when I was a measly sophomore in high school I had more freedom then I do now coming home from the hospital.

I decide to take a daring risk and ride my bike down to the small river that wasn't too far from Kendall's house. Once I'm at the river I peer over the wooden bridged railing. Most people stand up front: the in their hair, the river all around them, and the city up ahead looking almost quaint and not like a big pile of nothingness. I look at the water. It's dark, muddy brown, and slaps hard against the various rocks. I can see my shadow in it, all chopped up, bits and pieces scattered among the churning waves. I turn away, because I already know I'm broken, that there's nothing in me worth seeing anymore. I already know there's nothing worth believing. It's just how I am.

The air is still, a rain of stars elope in the sky sending silvery streaks of light to reflect onto the water. The humming of the mosquitos in my ears adds to my irritation. After minuets of telling myself over and over not to cry I find myself tearing up, the emotions I've kept bottled up inside like a safe, flood freely like wild horses. I don't try to hide it this time though, because I've been hiding it for too long. So I just sit on the grass, knees tucked securely under my chin and let my emotions and frustrations out under the stars. My single tear multiplying into a small tsunami coming down my cheeks, making my mascara run.

"Kit-Kat?"

I don't even flinch at the sudden noise, not an utter of sound escape my quivering lips. I hear my nick name being called again in a hushed manner, as well as heavy footsteps drawing closer to where I am sitting.

"You were right okay, you were right about Kyle. Is that what you came here for, to hear me tell you I was wrong?" I ask, trying to wipe the tears away but they keep falling. "Well I was wrong. There you heard it, you can leave now." I mutter the last words.

The two of us stare at each other, the darkness adding to the silence that was lingering between us. Hours seemed to pass between us when in reality it was probably only a few measly seconds.

It's James who breaks the silence. "I really wish I wasn't right Katie, I really do." He confesses, just as he plops down beside me. "You already had a boy hurt you and you shouldn't have had to be hurt a second time. I blame myself for that because if I never hurt you to begin with, well then we probably wouldn't even be discussing this here."

I don't say anything, except I just nod my head. "Katie, I came here to say sorry, not to gloat, not to say I was right, I came here to apologize toe girl I hurt two years ago hoping against hope she'd forgive me."

"Yes."

"Yes?" he asks, ruffling his eyebrows together into confusion.

"Yes, as in I forgive." I whisper back to him, turning to look up into the night sky, then back at the brunette who has one of the biggest smiles plastered on his delicate face, making me smile a little for the first time in so long.

We stay for only a few minutes longer until we both decide we should start to head back before it gets too late and Kendall starts to worry.

"Can I walk you back home?" James asks me, suddenly he wasn't the cool and collected person everyone perceived him to be, for a moment the sound of his voice acted as if he was shy. I think for a minuet before I nod my head, signaling him that it was okay. I hear him sigh in relief under his breath, which makes me giggle a little at his sudden change of personality. Maybe there was more to James then I thought.

I pulled my sweatshirt tight against me, crossing my arms to shield away from the crisp air as we walked in silence down the old gravel road that winded around to the house. The smell of pine needles and dust filled my nostrils as I looked at the moon shining bright in the sky as It hid behind some of the tall pine trees, crickets chirped once every now and again making the surroundings look and sound as if we were two kids at summer camp.

"Hey, remember that time when we all went to that awful summer camp for a week and we got our hands glued to the bench during craft session when we were like eight?" I ask aloud letting out a chuckle as I remember.

"Yeah, that was also the time when Kendall got stuck in the middle of the lake in the paddle boat and he couldn't get back to camp, he just kept turning in circles, so Logan had to go swim out and get him." James adds as we both laugh again.

"Let's not forget that same night Carlos freaked out half the campers because he thought there was a monster outside our cabin."

"Didn't it turn out to be some mad beaver?"

"It was a rabbit actually, with big fluffy ears." I tell him making bunny ears with both my hands and wiggling the tips of my fingers.

"Man, those were some amazing times." James breathes out, shoving his hands deep into his jean pockets.

"Yeah they were, and the four dorks I spent it with were amazing too."

We continue to talk until we make it up to the porch, I turn to my left and I see that James is no longer beside me. I spin around and see him mere feet away.

"Aren't you coming inside?" I ask, pointing to the screen door.

"I didn't really think you'd wa-…..yeah sure." He says, and gives me a small smile and we walk inside.

Once we're back in the house it seems as if no one even realized we even left, which I was kind of thankful for. Logan and Carlos are over, as well as two females I never met before, Haley and Amanda.

Haley looked to be about twenty-four. She had light blonde shoulder length hair and a petite frame; she also is wearing dark blue glasses which in my opinion complimented her eyes beautifully, I could tell by the looks and smiles Logan gave her that he really took a liking towards her.

Amanda was the total opposite, she has long dark curly hair with bright blue eyes and she was much taller than Logan's girl, she looked to be maybe 5'6.

I make an effort to introduce myself to the girls as all four boys head out ti the back yard to grill some hot dogs and hamburgers.

"Hi, I'm Kendall's sister." I begin to say, holding out my hand for them to shake, which they did. After little time the three of us are practically best friends. I find out Haley is from North Carolina, which would explain her light southern accent, she met Logan about a month ago on a snowboarding trip through a friend. And as for Amanda, She's from here, and met Carlos just a few days ago when she was at the same concert as him. Then it's my turn to tell them about me. So I do, I begin to tell them about how I grew up around all three of the boys, and how they all became my best friends, as well as Kendall's. I also tell them about my accident I had and the story of Kyle. But I purposely leave out James just for the sake of me being sane.

The night goes on and I realize as we all sit on the floor watching a movie how close James and I are sitting together. That if I reach out my hand I could interlock our fingers, but I fight the urge to do so.

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**IMPORTANT:**I feel as if this chapter was kind of rushed, I've been having some MAJOR writers block. And also, if you're a writer and are interested in helping me co-write a few chapters of this story and a couple of my others PLEASE leave a review or PM me...I really need some help I'd give you credit and everything but please! If you write or know someone who does write big time rush and is willing to help please let me know


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